At the recent Agudas Yisroel Convention, held over Thanksgiving weekend, the Novominsker Rebbe, Rav Yaakov Perlow, Rosh Agudas Yisroel, addressed an issue that is a sensitive but pressing one in the frum community.
The Rebbe’s remarks were delivered at the Thursday night session at the 88th National Agudah Convention, whose theme was “Leiv Avos al Bonim - For the Sake of Our Precious, Vulnerable Youth: Securing Our Yeshivos…Our Homes…Our Future.” The convention was held last weekend at the East Brunswick, NJ, Hilton.
The Rebbe spoke forcefully at the Thursday evening plenary session of the responsibility toward children shared by parents and the community. While a yeshiva may be a private institution, he said, they are agents of the community and, as such, must ensure that each child is ensured a classroom seat in a yeshiva or Bais Yaakov. By the same token, the community must take responsibility for supporting and maintaining yeshivos and day schools, not only in the largest communities, but across the entire country and across the parameters of the Orthodox world.
The Rebbe also spoke of the need for introspection, the need for serious cheshbon hanefesh, a need to identify and rectify the cracks in the walls that surround us and protect us. A child who is not in a school for whatever reason - financial, physical, emotional, or ideological - represents a crack in that structure. A school that is forced to close for lack of funds represents a crack in that structure. If special needs children who can be helped are not, and if teachers have to wait months for their salaries, there is something wrong. And as painful as it is to admit that the problem exists, said the Rebbe the possibility that a child could be molested in our own community is a crack that threatens the very integrity of the structure.
Ensuring that children find a safe haven in home and school was the topic of a late session on Thursday evening, led by Dr. Benzion Twerski. Noting that abuse takes many forms, Dr. Twerski spoke of the need to be certain that children are not victimized by the adults who are supposed to constitute their safety net. While admitting that he had no simple solutions to the problem, he did outline important steps that had to be taken to address it, including the need for parents to maintain open lines of communication with their children and be sensitive to any changes that could signal a problem, the need to educate teachers, caregivers, and school staff to detect the symptoms of abuse, and in the need to immediately remove anyone accused of an offense (albeit a rare occurrence in schools and unfortunately more likely to be a threat among other acquaintances), while simultaneously respecting the privacy of both the accuser and the accused.
Believing the child when they speak out is the most important thing that ANY adult can ever do.
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